decipher

isa muling tula.....

DECIPHER

silent knocks upon the door
cold sweat running to the florr
seems you made me glad afterall

the next day a new tomorrow
but this time around you face away
guess you've made me cry afterall

for a moment the two of us are happy
after a second everything felt rocky
I just want to make you mine

all I ever wanted is to know you
all I ever want is to understand
but I can't fit all the pieces
still I really want you bad

breezing winds brush my face
with the quickly changing days
think I'm confused afterall


for a moment the two of us are happy
after a second everything felt rocky
I just want to make you mine

all I ever wanted is to know you
all I ever want is to understand
but I can't fit all the pieces
still I really want you bad

now stay here in front of me
tell me all the hings you see
don't remove your pretty eyes on mine
tell me how you really feel
tell me if you really care
don't wanna be a fool anymore..

all I ever wanted is to know you
all I ever want is to understand
but I can't fit all the pieces
still I really want you bad

neurosis..

haaay..tagal din akong d nagchat..la magawa..bad3p ako ngayun..kaya idadaan ko nalang sa kanta..kung mababasa mo 2..sana...ewan.......

neurosis

heads spinning
thought provoked
i never felt like this before

night's approaching
still no progress
can't stay this way anymore

the pain is killing me
you're killing me
just one of your precious hello's will do

with issues and social turmoil abreast
hold me till the day's rest
so i won't try again

failed ambiions
but still going on
results may vary afterall

morbid thoughts
eating me alive
such is this disaster

the pain is killing me
you're killing me
just one of your precious hello's will do

with issues and social turmoil abreast
hold me till the day's rest
so i won't try again

shame on me
for my wanting to be free
with your image bounding me

i thought it's that easy
that it's just a walk in the park
guess i'm wrong again

as always..

never right..

as always..

starting a fight..

as always..

as always..

as always..

the pain is killing me
you're killing me
just one of your precious hello's will do

with issues and social turmoil abreast
hold me till the day's rest
so i won't try again

memoirs of an adik

are you familiar with the game gunbound?well,it's a worms armaggedon kind of game where you get to blast your opponent to oblivion with powerful projectiles and shift the momentum with the aid of items. it's a very addicting but the game's best advantage over the other games of its genre is its free! so if you don't have any more ragna load or you are just getting tired of playing MMORPGs you can play gunbound..

GAMEPLAY
as earlier mentioned,this game reminds many of WA in the sense that it's a shoot'em type of game. you can choose up to 13(correct me if im wrong) mobles plus 2 hidden mobles,each with varying shhoting abilities. the nak machinefor example, fires an electrically charged ball which goes down the ground first before registering damage. during the game you also gain acces to items which strengthens your mobile by increasing its damage or by recovering hp. players also get to suit up their avatars to boost their character attributes. there are 3 character attributes: popularity(increases the amount of gold you get after doing something),defense and the attack(or is it offense?). by winning games,you get to level-up your rank,starting up with chick. you level-up by earning GPs and you get GPs by winning. during the game,if you execute something(for example you registered 200+ damage) you are rewarded with gold, which value increases with popularity.

SIGHTS and SOUNDS
the graphics are very impressive. despite @being a 2D game,it is still a sight to see because of the well-crafted background,the beautifully designed mobiles and the incredible special effects. the action is a sight to see which makes Gunbound literally a must-see game. the sounds on the other hand,presents a childlike feel. listening to the background music wheteher you are in a sever channel,in a waiting room or already in battle makes one feel like watching a cartoon for kids. nevertheless,the sounds complement the colorful graphics of the game and playing it brings out the 8-year old in you,whatever your age is.

PHYSICS CONCEPT
the game comes with a touch of physics. firstly,you may have noticed that the mobles come with angles of varying length, which affects the mobile's shot selection. take the bigfoot for example. it has a very short angle range making it a clos-combat type of moblie. trouble arises however once the bigfoot gets caught in a deep narrow hole. with its short angle, it wont be able to fire directly to the opponent. then ther's the wind. the wind's direction could either help you or frustrate you since it is constanly shifting. another is the hurricane. it appears randomly in some maps and when you fire at it,it will disrupt its direction and if you're not careful, your shot will miss badly.

OVERALL
all in all,gunbound is one great game. nice graphics,nice sound,solid gameplay. the plus factor:
you get to learn a thing or two about physics.

depression..

me mga instances talaga sa buhay natin na talagang nagpapalungkot sayo..yung tipong gusto mo lang magkulong sa kwarto at umiyak ng buong magdamag..wala ka ng paki sa mundo..ang gusto mo lang gawin eh umiyak ng todotodo..

'i don't wanna stay in one spot
and cry all day long
i don't wanna spend my time
shedding tear after tear
but..
i can't help it...'

lalake ako..bilang isang lalake,hindi ko dapat pinapakita ng diretsahan ung pagddrama ko..maraming sitwasyong gusto kong umiyak..pero d ko gngwa dahil nga lalake ako..pero..ano ngayon??

'how can an angel
with sparkling eyes
fair lips
and elegant smile
strike a heart of stone
and reduce it to pebbles?'

i still want to stay with this feeling..di rin ganon kadaling kalimutan xa..ayokong kalimutan xa..bat kc kelangan pang maging gani2?cguro nga dapat di ko nalang xa nakilala..hanglabo ng buhay ko ngayon..

'when will the sun's daylight
shining through the meadows,
glistening with the clouds
whilst enjoying its glory at the summit
give way to the dark night
bombarded with lonely stars
enveloped in an empty space
looking down to the people at slumber?'

umaasa pa rin ba ako ngayon?oo..napapagod na ba ako sa kakaasa?oo..gusto ko na ba tumigil?hinde..teka..oo..sandali..hindi..teka..ano ba..magulo..nakakalito..

one part says 'you had enough..time to get on with your life'..the other part says 'you can't get enough..she is your life'..litong lito na talaga ako..ewan..bahala na..cguro tgil muna..ititigil ko muna tong kahibangang to......

meeting an angel..(a senior's love story)

according to the bible,no words that we know can truly describe what heaven looks like..it's hard to fathom a place like that..but what we all know is we are going to experience eternal happiness there..

if that's the case,then i can't wait to reach heaven..

coz im already experiencing happiness by just stealing a glimpse from a certain angel in quesci..

she's a third year high school student..a young,petite and charming damsel..when i first knew her,though..i have no idea what she really looks like..but one thing i knew though is that i enjoy her company..i had fun talking to her and even though we haven't met each other that time,i felt that we knew each other for a long time..

the day i came to know her was unexpected..on that day i was infatuated with another fair lady..all of a sudden,she broke the ice and talked to me..of course i was elated with the fact that i get to meet a fellow scientian..we had a grand talk..and i never thought that conversation will turn my life over..

before i met her,i ws miserable..i let false emotions take over me..i was always absent-minded and criticized because of the attitude im showing..i was swallowed by infatuation to say the least..i always find myself sitting by my lonesome,looking at the sky wondering why i was blessed or cursed with a life like this..in fact,i find myself doing the same thing until now..probably because that hard-to-believe soccer field chase keeps haunting me every now and then..now you may think this is corny,or too mushy but that haunting memory made me afraid to love so much and get nothing in return..

but now..just by looking at her picturesque smile and sparkling eyes make me discard my old perspective..i felt a strong,sweeping emotion urging me to risk everything..i do get confused but my confusion quickly gets replaced by gladness..(okay,i know thisis getting mushy but i bet that you feel the same way when you see your loved one)now..seeing her is no longer enough..i want to sit beside her..i want to talk to her for hours..i want to hold her hand and tell her what i feel again and again..im not sure if my crazy dream will happen but one thing's for sure though..this time im willing to gamble..even if im miles apart from her that wont stop me..

that's how much i love this angel..

yes i used the word love..

and not...uhh what's that word again???




hey you..yeah you know who you are..if you are reading this i would just like to reminf you again that your mere presence makes me happy..with that i wanna thank you..thank you for the chance of meeting you..thank you for all the countless hi's and hello's..thank you coz because of you,im in the right direction now..

thank you and i love you......Ü

practice makes perfect?

JUST A THOUGHT: It's ironic that while God is an omniscient, eternal and perfect entity His most beautiful creation in this earth are the imperfect humans- us. It's rather strange for someone that's so powerful, unblemished and free from sin to love someone that's sinful, weak and stubborn. In fact, He had gone to the extent of giving up His only begotten Son to save us all. T guess what this beautiful fact implies is that despite our shortcomings and weaknesses and sins, we are still special in God's eyes, even if others think otherwise.

It is very rewarding to know that among the innumerable living things in this world, us humans are the only ones gifted with exceptional knowledge and incredible abilities. Because of our superiority, we have been dubbed as the stewards of all of God's creations. We fulfill our task by utilizing our talents. Of course, since we are made imperfect, there are times when our talents are not enough to accomplish our goals. So in order to improve our work, we need to improve our talents.And that's when practicing comes in to play.

Practice is defined in by Webster as "to perform an act or exercise a skill repeatedly in order to achieve greater command." There are other definitions about this word but in general, we practice so that we can better our skills and God-given attributes. To be a good basketball player, you need to practice playing constantly. Because of our thirst to keep getting better, we practice everyday so that we will keep improving day by day. Many people who are passionate about their favorite skill pracrices night and day not only to get better but to be the best. This struggle to be the greatest gave birth to the phrase "practice makes perfect." It's simple you keep practicing everytime and you keep improving. But, if you think about it, if we keep practicing we get better than what we are previously. So even if you are the best basketball player in the world but you still think you can do better and that's why you practice, you will get even better and better and better and better. You may be asking me now what's the point of all these hulabaloo I'm yapping about. Well, no matter how hard we practice, we can never get perfect. SO if you are already the best basketball player and you still practice, you still aren't the perfect player. 'Cause if you are, you cannot miss your shots. Come on, nobody's perfect so why practice?

It's because of that phrase that has given the people the misconception about practtice. Probably because people are so crazy about becoming the best that's why they practice so hard. But if we look at the definition of practice again we learn that we can only get better by pracricing. We can never be perfect. If this falacy of practice is true, then teher will be many people who will be like God.

Bottomline: if the only reason you practice is because of what the title of this cr*ap implies, then you are just fooling yourself. And besides, if God wants us to be perfect, He could have done it when He first created man.

And thank God He is the only one perfect. 'Cause if He isn't, who knows what will happen to this world.

usapang banyo..

Question:

Ano ang pinakaimportanteng room sa bahay?

sala?me mga bahay na walang sala eh..kung meron man,yung sala na rin eh nagiging silid-tulugan,etc..

bedroom?pwede ka nman maulog kahit saan dba?

kitchen?kung gutom ka,pwede ka nmang kumain ng instant noodles..

so..siret na kayo kung ano ang pinakaimportanteng room sa bahay?anu pa ba edi ang cr o banyo!!!bakit??isipin nio..kung walang banyo,san kayo iihi, tat*e at maliligo?sa sala?sa bedroom?sa kitchen?

actually,hindi lang sa bahay importante ang banyo..kahit saan..sa isang malaking kumpanya,masasabi natin na ang banyo ay mas importante pa kesa sa conference room..pano ko nasabi yon?isipin nio ule..halos lahat ng mga conference room may cr o may malapit na cr..ang cr ba mayoon o may malapit na conference room?wala!!mangyayari lang yun pag nasa isang kumpanya lang..getzz??

so,ano ang gusto kong palabasin sa banyo??ang bayo kasi ang pinakamissunderstood na lugar sa buong mundo..di masyadong nabibigyang pansin ang banyo..makinig kayo na balita..nakikita natin sa TV ang white house..ang WTC..ang Malacanyang..yung mga banyo??siguro minsan pero di lagi..pero kung iisipin nio..ang pinakamagandang bahay o ang pinakamataas na building o ang pinakamagarang mansyon ay walang kwenta kung walang banyo..imagine..nasa napakalaking mansyon ka..ang laki ng space..ang daming mamahaling kagamitan..pero wala namang banyo..eh nagkataong puputok na yang oantog mo..anong gagawin mo?sa mga oras nayun,iisipin mo na ang pinakamalaking bahay o ang pinakamamahaling kagamitan ay hindi importante kung magkakasakit ka naman sa bato..speaking of sakit..anung kwarto ang pwedeng makapigil sa mga sakit?banyo lang wala ng iba!!pagnaligo ka,ligtas ka sa germs..pagnaglalabas ka ng sama ng loob ligtas ka sa constipation..at pagumihi ka,ligtas ka sa UTI..kaya ba yang gawin ng ibang kwarto sa bahay??HINDI!!!!!!

maihahalintulad natin ang mga iba't-ibang kwarto ng bahay sa buhay..me mga tao(yung ibang kwarto) na pinagmamayabang ang kanilang mga physical appearance pero limitado naman ang kanilang mga nagagawa..me mga tao(yung banyo) naman na humble dahil wala maxadong taglay na kagwapuhan o kagandahan pero napakasipag naman at maablidad sa buhay..pag nakatagpo sila ng isang sitwasyon na parang di nila makakaya,gumagawa sila ng paraan para malusutan iyon..

maikukumpara din natin ang mga banyo sa mga taong wala namang angking kagwapuhan o kagandahan o mga abilidad na katangitangi na totoo kung umibig..kumpara sa ibang lalake o babae..ung mga taong "banyo" ay mas totoo yung nararamdaman kesa sa mga taong ngpapakyut lang..oo nga't gwapo sila at maabilidad pero infatuation lang ang nararamdaman nila..

bottomline:hindi natin dapat binabaliwala ang mga taong "banyo"..sa katunayan nga dapat natin silang gayahin..di kasi sila arogante at tahimik kung magtrabaho..totoo rin sila kung magmahal..sila yung mga taong di maxado pinapansin ng iba dahil di nila pinagmamayabang ang kanilang mga accomplishments..

kaya ngayon..magisip ka..suriin mo ang iyong sarili..isa ka bang "banyo" o nangangamoy banyo ka lang?

mabuhay ang mga torpe!!!!!!

nangyari na ba sa inyo minsan na nagkaroon kayo ng katapangan?lam nio na..sinasabi nio sa sarili nio "bukas kakausapin ko siya..walang makakapigil sakin!!kakausapin ko siya at sasabihin ko na ang nararamdaman ko para sa kanya.."tas kinabukasan,nung nakita mo na yung sasabihan mo nun,kumaripas ka ng takbo..para bang nakakita ka ng multo(im sure maraming kalalakihan na ang nakaranas nito)..

pagkatorpe..eto ang namamagitan sa isang lalake at sa kanyang iniirog..pagtorpe ka nga naman,di mo xa magagawang lapitan para kausapin..pag nakikita mo xa,kinakabahan ka at gusto mong tumakbo papalayo..pag nakatabi mo naman siya,filing mo masusuka ka na..at pag kinausap ka nia,nagiging absent-minded ka..tinatanong mo sa sarili mo.."nako,anong sasabihin ko sa kanya?" o "dyahe naman,nakakahiya" o "noooh,sana nagpaplastic surgery na lang ako kahapon!"..sa paningin ng mga kaibigan natin,pangit ang pagkatorpe..dapat kung manliligaw ka,iwan mo na sa bahay ang pagkatorpe mo..xempre dapat maganda impression ng liligawan mo sayo kaya dapat wag kang matorpe..pero,isa ba talagang negative trait ang pagkatorpe?

may dalawang uri ng manliligaw..ung mga masugid na manliligaw at yung mga playboys..yung mga playboys ung mga mabibils kumilos..di na sila nakakaramdam ng pagkatorpe dahil sa self-confidence nila..pag me nanligaw sayo na playboy makakasiguro ka na hindi ikaw ang pinakauna niyang niligawan..dahil ang mga playboys ussually ay may track record ng mga naging syoting nila..sila yung mga kinaiinisan ng mga kaibigang babae ng nililigawan nila..sila yung mga laging nagyayabang sa mga kaibigang lalake nila tungkol sa mga experiences nila sa babae..xempre,imbes na purihin ang kanilang self-confidence,eh kinaiinisan pa sila ng mga tao..kasi kaya naman nanliligaw ang mga playboy eh dahil me inaalagaan silang reputasyon..yun ang importante sa kanila reputasyon..mas importante pa sa mga babaeng niloloko nila..of course di naman lahat ng mga playboy ganito and as of this writing, may mga playboy na gusto ng magbago..pero kung iisipin mo ng mabutikaya sila hindi natotorpe sa panliligaw dahil alam nilang hindi sila mababasted..xempre that's not always rhe case..bottomline is,ang mga playboy ay hindi natotorpe dahil sa iba ang pananaw nila at gustong mangyari sa panliligaw..

ung sa mga masusugid na manliligaw naman..una sa lahat,me mga playboy din na masugid na manliligaw so ano ang pagkakaiba?ung mga tunay na masugid na manligaw kasi eh natotorpe..sila yung mga tipong hindi na alam ang gagawin pag kaharap na yung liligawan nila..ironically,sila yung mga taong nagdadalawang isip na manligaw..so pano sila naging masugid?ganito yun..courting playboys are run by confidence and reputation..courting torpes on the other hand are run by selfless,unconditional luv..isipin nio..kaya natotorpe yung mga torpe kasi ganito yung iniisip nila.."nako..mahal ko talaga xa pero,pano pag ayaw nia sakin?" o "mahal ko xa pero pano pag di ako ang nararapat sa kanya?" negative thinkers kasi ang mga torpe..ayaw nilang maging optimistic kasi baka ang maging impression ng babae sa kanila eh mayabang sila..gusto kasi nila na pasayahin yung nililigawan nila..masasabi natin na ang mga torpe na sweet lovers(although maraming playboys na sweet lovers)..iniisip rin ng mga torpe na pag nabasted na sila ng nililigawan nila eh tapos na ang mundo nila..parang takot na silang umibig uli(waw drama)..kasi iniisip nila na yung mga nililigawan nila eh yung gusto nilang makasama habang buhay..

alam nio ba na pwede ring matorpe ang mga playboy?contrary to what I mentioned earlier,mangyayari lang ito pag nakakita ang isang natural na playboy ng isang babae na magpapatibok ng kaniyang puso..pag tinamaan ka ng pana ni cupido,kahit playboy ka pa,matotorpe ka rin..

so ano nga ba ang ibig sabihin ng torpe?para sakin,hindi negative trait ang pagkatorpe..in fact,isa itong signal na tunay yung pagmamahal mo at wala kang masamang intensyon sa panliligaw mo..pag torpe ka,iniisip mo yung mga consequences ng mga ginagawa mo hindi tulad ng mga playboy na maxadong aggressive..ibig sabihin lang nun..pagnatorpe ka,eh nagmamahal ka nga ng tunay..

huwalalang....

minsan talagang napakasaklap ng buhay..

pagkagising mo,sumasakit ulo mo..ayaw mo pa gumising pero kelangan..tapos pagbukas mo ng computer wala ka na palang load..sinubukan mong magtest pero ang sabi "check operator services"..tapos ung tanging magagawa mo na lang e manood tapos ung channel na panonoorin mo eh bglang nawala!!hala..and to top it all off,wala ka pang pera!!!!so in other words,you are stuck in your boring old room studying..not your typical day eh?

actually, ganyan ang simula ng araw ko..nakakapagonlayn lang ako ngayon dahil pinautang ako ng tita ko..haaaay..sa mga pagkakataong ito,marami sa atin ang magsasabi na 'life sucks' o 'sana di nalang ako nabuhay'..at hindi pa yan ang pinakagrabeng sitwasyon..

just look around..in a third-world country such as ours, mendicancy and poverty is evident in the streets..makikita mo sila sa mga overpass,sa mga bangketa, at kung saan-saan pa..hindi lang kahirapan ang problema..yung mga kalapating mababa ang lipad..you know what I mean..yung mga gumagala sa gabi at naghahanap ng mga customers..sila yung mga nagbebenta ng katawan para mabuhay..wala silang paki kung magkaanak sila ng sangkatutak at hindi pa pananagutan ng mga lalake nia o magkaroon sila ng mga sakit tulad ng STD o AIDS..hindi pa tapos..yung mga gays,lesbians at yung mga may special conditions..di natin maikakaila na yung mga taong tulad nila ay hindi masyadong tinatanggap ng society..at siyempre wag nating kalilimutan yung mga naghihirap dahil sa

marami pang mga problema sa mundo ngayon na pag dumating sa buhay mo eh siguradong maghihinayang ka na nabubuhay ka pa..basta't makaranas ka lang ng kahirapan, eh talagang madedepress ka..hmm..pero ganun ba talaga?hindi kaya nasa isip lang natin na nahihirapan tayo dahil sa current condition natin?pero try nio lang na pag me problema kayo tratuhin nio yun bilang isang pagsubok at hindi isang parusa..dahil hindi nman tayo bibigyan ni Lord ng problemang hindi natin masosolve..try nio lang..pag me problema,just be optimistic..

lessons brought about by the soccerfield chase..

(note: di ko muna itutuloy ung story..kakatamad eh..hehehe)

flowers.

these things represent so many things. love. vanity. fragility. nature. how a very simple object projects so many things is a mystery to me. nevertheless, flowers are subject to one of the most misunderstood events of a human individual's life: courting.

courting..hmm..sounds fun..not much of a challenge, right?WRONG!!
courting is never easy..well at least for those who court for the sake of true, honest luv, not money or lust..but LUV..when men(in this generation however, boys) court, they don their best clothes, get their best hairstyle, spray their bodies with suffocating perfume and memorize mushy lines from equally mushy love songs..then when they (think they) are ready, they proceed to the girl's place and stay for a while, chatting until the break of dawn..some guys, who are still stuck in the era of their granparents bring guitars with them and and render a song, in an attempt to attract the love interest (of course, it's proven that when a guy serenades a gal, the guy attracts the attention of barking dogs if not the irritated faces of the gal's parents)..others try to get the side of the folks, by courting the mother first..you see, it's common belief that if you court the mommy, you get the gally(one of my pathetic attempts of making good quotes)..once the mother likes you, then visiting the girl won't be that hard..there's a risk, however..by paying attention to the mom, there's a tendency that the girl will get annoyed if not jealous..afterall, she's the reason why the guy's doing all these hard work..result?the girls dumps the guy, which is a staggering blow to the guy's reputation(and if the he's emotional, his self-esteem)..

of course, the key to a girl's heart is not the number of your attempts to get her attention, nor the amount of money you spend to give her gifts, nor your irresistable smile, heck, not even your deep love for her..in fact all of these are useless if you don't have patience..yes patience..if you really love someone, you must be patient..you never know the girl is just testing your endurance..always remember that love is patient..if you are agrresive and hasty on your actions even if you feel so much love and affection, you will almost always get a resounding "no" from the fair damsel..

take it from me..gifts and looks and intentions are nothing w/out patience..and w/out patience, then that's not love you're feeling my friend.......

farewell to the yesterdays..

Friendship.

One of the most precious things in the world. It is from friendship that true love is conceived thus giving birth to a brand new relationship. We don't realize the true value and power of friendship until we lose it. In times like these when we are ravaged with personal problems brought by interpersonal and intrapersonal conflicts, we can rely on a person we call "friend" to help straighten ourselves. There are two types of friends however. Those who help solve our problems positively(eg by counseling, etc) and those that do the exact opposite(eg persuading them to use drugs). Anyway let's go back to the topic. Along the way we get to meet people and make friends with them but only a select few get to be your friends. Fewer still get to have an intimate relationship with you.

When i grew up, I never really had anyone who I can call a friend. Back in my elementary days I was the laughing stock of the class. Always the center of jeers, criticisms and insults. I cannot remeber the exact number of times that I cried. I was all alone. Lonely. I did manage to be with a group but even though I regard them as my friends, they do not regard me as such. But things changed when I was in high school. The former lonely, nerdy, lanky, sniveling kid who is always crying on his seat has become a mature, happy, pimply(life's harsh), strong witty teener who is always crying "asa." As I look back to the past, I cannot imagine what life will I live if I didn't study here in Quesci. I cannot fathom what will become of me had I not met my friends. I guess the One above just wants each and every people in this imperfect world to experience the joys of being with people we call friends. Until now I still feel lonely and all alone but still, I know i can rely on my buddies to help me out. Yep, when old geezers tell you taht friends are God's gifts to us, you better believe them.





Let me take this opportunity to thank my "barkada." My real barkada. The GB adix. Without you guys, the past would still haunt me until my bones and flesh get eaten by worms.

masaya...

"..ang pagibig..
ganyan talaga...
ako'y nilamon ng pagibig..
ganyan talaga...
masaya......"
ewan..nang marinig ko yung mga linyang yan, pinatay ko bgla yung radyo..di ko alam kung ano ang nagtulak sakin para gawin yun..di ko na lang namalayan na me luhang tumulo mula sa mata ko..di ko maintindihan bat ngyari yun..masaya nman ako nitong mga nagdaang araw..wala namang nangyari na dapat kong ikalungkot o iyakan..hmmm..siguro madrama lang talaga ako..

mahilig ako magpakasenti..ung magisa ka lang..tapos nakikinig ng mga kanta ng Rivermaya, Sugarfree, Spongecola..kahit mahilig ako sa atensyon, me mga oras na gusto ko lang talaga magisa para makapagisip..at makinig lang sa mga kantang me mga lirikong sobrang patama sakin..hmmm..cguro dahil sa sobrang pagkasenti ko eh naging baduy na madrama na makata ako..ewan..basta pag nasa mood ako, bigyan nio lang ako ng panulat tsaka papel at voila! instant tula..kadalasan pag wala talaga akong magawa(tulad ngayon) mga kung anuano ang mga naiisip ko na gusto kong isulat..masyado talagang malawak imahinasyon ko(at dahil dun kaya ako laging problemado) kaya marami akong nalalaman(meron nga ba?)..sa totoo lang, pag nakakatapos ako ng isang buong tula, natutuwa ako sa nagawa ko..parang hindi ako ang gumawa..tawagin nio na akong mayabang pero subukan nio ring gumawa ng isang bagay at pag nakita niong napakaganda ni2, matutuwa din kayo..

tula..ano ba ang meron sa mga tula?mga salitang magkatugma?yun naman kasi yung madalas hinahanap sa isang tula eh..pero pag wala ng tugma, hindi mo masasabing tula din yun pwera na lang pag nakaayos ng by stanza o pag sinabi ng gumawa nito..hmmm..minsan ganun din ang pagibig..di mo masasabing nagkakagusto na ang isang tao sayo kahit napakalantaran na nia kung hindi nia sasabihin sayo..ganun nman diba?ginagawa mo na ang lahat para sa kanya..pinapakita mo sa kanya na mahal mo xa..kulang na lang ipagsigawan sa mundo..PERO..hindi nia yun papansinin..hindi nia iisipin na napaibig ka na nia hangga't di mo sasabihin..

matapos ang ilang segundo ng pagdadrama, bigla ko na lang naisip ang dahilan kung bakit ako nagkaganon..ipinakita ko na sa kanya..sinabi ko na sa kanya..pero bat ganun pa rin?wala pa ring nangyayari?siguro meron pang ibang paraan kung paano mo masasabi kung ang isang talata ng salita ay isang tula..

siguro meron pang paraan kung pano nia ako maiintidihan..

siguro meron pang paraan para ako'y maging masaya..